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In
Alcoholics Anonymous, there is an old expression that says, "There
are three times when you should go to a meeting: 1. When you don't feel
like going to a meeting, 2. When you do feel like going to a meeting, 3.
And at Eight O'clock." Eight O’clock was prime time for AA, because
(in the early days) no one wanted to be recognized entering the meeting in
daylight. The meeting is a
source of connection with the real you, not pretentious masks are worn in
a support group.
It is not a matter of how you feel about it. It is how you behave about
it. In Twelve Step meetings, there is a "ninety meetings in ninety
days" tenet. This rule is ideal.
Most major metropolitan areas have meetings every day of the week.
This can be more difficult if you get into a tough situation when you are
far removed from metropolitan areas. If this happens to you, you may want
to consider talking with someone in a meeting that you can get together
with more frequently as an option. Addicts
and sexual sinners have a common bond of knowing the truth and recognizing
dangerous behaviors, something a family member will not recognize because
we have been liars for so long.
The meeting is basically to support you and at some point give back to
others what you have learned through your own particular journey of
recovery. Being around other recovering sex addicts is going to help you.
First it is going to give you hope as you see other sex addicts
have some sobriety. Second, you may believe that if they can do it, you
can too. You can learn things from them that they have learned through
their negative or positive experiences. It is to your benefit to go to
as many meetings as possible.
A lot of meetings may sound like a sacrifice.
But, that could be “minimum thinking” as opposed to
"maximum thinking." Maximum thinking is asking yourself,
"how much can I do? What can I clear out of my schedule, especially
for the first ninety days of my recovery." Minimum thinking is
"How little can I do. Can I possibly go to one meeting a week and be
able to satisfy my wife's anger or my own conscience." Minimum
thinking can hurt you in the long run.
If you decide you want to recover, you will want to hit it hard at
the front. The best way to get recovery it is to attend as many meetings
as possible. See what you can remove from your schedule. Three months is a
very short period of time to go to every meeting that you can. If you need
a listing of the meetings please see our website.
STEP ONE "We
admitted we were powerless over our sexual addiction-that our lives had
become unmanageable."
POWERLESS
Powerlessness is a state
of being that Americans do not really accept or even acknowledge.
Sometimes we can not even face our powerlessness in the presence of
overwhelming facts.
What are some of the facts that lead you to believe that you are powerless
over your sexual addiction?
1.___________________________________________________________________
2.___________________________________________________________________
3.___________________________________________________________________
4.___________________________________________________________________
What does it mean to you
to be powerless over your sexual addiction? Define "powerless." |